Here are a longer backround text for some of the songs.
A CHOIR OF ANGELS ⚔️
This lyrics is inspired by a dream I had a couple of years ago. In my dream I saw the The Devil himself. He was dressed in an armor with horns like a ram and I could only see his eyes. He looked at me and wanted me to join his army. He wanted me to be his soldier.
I turned down his offer, but I never forgot that dream. It was very strong, like as if it happened for real. Now I made lyrics out of it. Sometimes when life crushes you really hard it feels like that the only thing left of you is a pool of blood on the ground. I have felt that feeling. Someone told me that in some armies they start with crushing you down totally to the ground, so that they afterwards can build you up – stronger than ever. That’s what happening to me now. I’m rising from the pool of blood on the ground. I feel strong; physically, mentally and spiritually. I wanna join the army. But not the army of evil. I want to join The Army of the Lion.
LYCKOKASTANJ 🌱 (Chestnut of Luck)
I have written a song in Swedish that is based on one of my earlier poems. It’s from a sad part of my life that I still need healing from. My friend Cowboy Dreamer made the instrumental sound and also the singing. I am very thankful because he put the feelings into tones.
This song is is dedicated to men and women who live in relationships with abuse and stalking. And if there are children involved who are affected too of course. That is the most important. Abuse can affect both men, women and children. It’s common to feel guilt. Being exposed to abuse are in some cases associated with feelings of shame. We all need to be a part of changing that.
I wrote this song in the spring of 2020. The poem I wrote in the summer of 2016. I used to be in a relationship where I was periodically subjected to violence. Physically, psychologically and latently. I have felt a lot of fear since then. It has affected me a lot. My mercy is that I have no feelings for him anymore. It’s always harder if you do I guess. Don’t go back. You are worth a life of peace. Peace.
Sometimes there is an explanation for the abuse. Tragic and trauma has sometimes been a part of the abusers life too. It’s not an excuse. Not even a reason. It’s just sad. We need authorities in Sweden to help to handle all this things. All of the things based on the current situation.
It’s not always easy to forgive and healing sometimes takes time. We all do wrong. We are humans. I am not perfect either. Who is perfect? With forgiveness comes freedom. I believe that. There is always a new beginning for someone. Stalking, harassment, threatening and violence is never okey though. Never.
The song is called ”Lyckokastanj” (Chestnut of Luck). That was a plant that I once saw in a store. It had a beautiful name, but scars. I am in a part of my life right now where I feel sadness and sorrow for somewhat other reasons. I pray for better times. I have hope in my heart.